Huh?

///A FUCK BUDDY FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS

           Interesting little (blogging this with no glasses or contacts so I can barely see a fucking, hehe, thing) point of time I'm currently in. Dated(?) Clara for a little bit (which is a story for a later time that is just much much mucho tres overdue really) and while I was dating her I ended up fucking a co-worker on a random Monday night after work. I was a "just the tip" virgin until that Monday night since that's what I truly believe. Went out to 529 to see a live band and early on I popped into my car to take a small dose of Molly. Probably wasn't the best idea but the end results were worth it. Got hammered there throughout the night and ended up ringing up a tab <$100+tip and had some interesting conversation with the band. Oh yeah, this was a Polaroid night too so I got one of those for me lil' album. (My procrastination is so real... fml) Anyways, later on in the night Linda (that's a name that won't ring the same anymore) showed up to drunk as well. Vaguely remember having given her a molly dose too. 

         The three of us did a usual night out thing of just getting hammered to the point of constant stammers and eventually stumbled to Cook Out for an Uber back to Danny's. Apparently it was almost 5:00 AM and we were still a raucous group that one of Danny's roommates had to yell at us. Deserved. They said I fell hard on the front porch over a bunch of shit and knocked it over. Yaaaasss! (?) (There's this "G" letter missing out of the keyboard and whatever spokes and holes were holding it down before look like the shape of a face like dees :-E LOLLL) I ended up passing out with Linda up in Danny's room while he slept on the downstairs living room couch. Me and Linda had already slept in the same bed before and so I didn't expect anything to be different this time around except I forgot about the mystery drug addition MOLLY. Wait, actually last time too we had gone to a day show and took molly with others. Hmph, okay I'm wrong. Well THIS time my desire to teddy bear someone while I sleep was too much and i brazenly (incredibly) drunkenly asked to hold her. She agreed and some sort of conversation ensued that entailed her asking to fuck me 'cuz thoughts like that just don't cross the mind of a twenty-five year old virgin. I told her I was a virgin which she later admitted that that turned her on more. And so the fuckery began. I didn't cum but I think she did. I was too drunk I guess. We fucked in the morning again.

  

          So now that was about a month ago and it still goes on. Nothing more will come of this agreement since she is "married" to Dave. Which is so weird. She knows it's wrong and so do I but at the same time we enjoy each others' company and have that mutual understanding. We have fun but I don't think I could see being with her and I don't think she does either which is great. 

            Sex though, isn't all that I fantasized it to be. Don't get me wrong she is an amazing fuck buddy since she shows me what to do and thinks I'm hot which makes me horny just to please her. Tease and Please, that's my motto hahaha -___- (I could definitely blog more. This is easy to just let my thoughts spill out onto the interweb. I've known it but just too lazy. FUCK YOU) Also, sex is fucking messy as FUCK! I'd much rather just slip on a condom and cum into that, dismount, toss it in the trash, and do a quick lower-body shower. Quick and easy. Whereas going raw feels soooo much better, it has two cons: 1) I can't last as long which for me is a bit of a problem. Getting better at it though. KEGEL! & 2) The goddamn jizz gets everywhere. Dick is a goddamn semen cannon sometimes. "How the fuck did it get there?" has been a question multiple times. Using a condom is cool too since well, y'know, no chance of babies. That conversation is not cool... I've also realized that I'm much more of a giver than a taker in bed. I don't mind cumming so long as she does first. Not even once, I want her to cum twice at least. What's fun for you is fun for me.

            Maybe the best part about having this going on is that I see what a relationship with good chemistry should be like. Which Clara everything so so forced and awkward. Only got okay when we had a few drinks. With Linda around everything is just a lot easier. There's no wondering what to say next I feel completely comfortable saying nothing or saying anything. (Well, not so much the "saying anything" part, but that's just because of me. I have yet to open up to anyone I know about all the troubles I have and more importantly, had. She doesn't have any trouble though.) Inside jokes are really easy to create and just brings back laughter. 

She says she hopes I find a girl just as weird as me and her.

I'm gonna miss Linda when she moves away.

What an interesting little chapter I'm in in my life.